As a young girl, the news of my pregnancy hit me hard like Hurricane Katrina. I was disappointed in myself, I could not come to terms with the thought of a bulging tummy, the thought of a crying baby- I loved my sleep too much to think of interruptions. I crept into denial, refused to accept that I was going to be a mother leave alone accepting my readiness for motherhood. I weighed my options, I thought of how I could hide away deliver the young and sell it then resurface back to my 'fun' world, but even then motherhood was slowly creeping into my system and I could not bare to abandon the young in me. I started taking photos, going for belly arts, swimming and other things that made me feel I wasn't slowly losing my life. It was the longest 7 months(I only got to learn of it at 8 weeks) of my life. The course of my life was changing, priorities shifted, decision determiners changed, I practically found a whole new me. At 4 months I met a lady who complimente...
It is very easy for Psychiatrists and Psychologists to approach suicide and suicidal tendencies from a point of triggers, with the aim of identifying the specific point of origin. My doctor has previously told me that understanding my triggers will go along way into keeping the suicidal tendencies at bay. Of course coupled with medication and therapy. The more I think about it, the more I study myself, the more the whole trigger story doesn't make sense to me. Am all about following doctors orders and advice, I don't self medicate, and always stick to my prescription and only leave it after a discussion with my doctor. I understand am my own worst enemy when it comes to mental illness so I do my best in guarding me from myself - I hope that makes sense to someone. Thing is, I have learnt that I have two separate sections of my brain which work totally differently. The alpha is the inactive section which does not take part in actively influencing things like speech or walking. W...
Finally my call to the Love Factory Customer Service was picked, we all know how long that 'on hold' moment can be. Always good to make the call early to allow for the waiting period. So, the customer service representative asked for my description and Confirmed availability, and I gave my address for delivery purposes. Then tension, butterflies and anxiety creeped in, fear of numerous unknowns, past mistakes and so many other things. Long story short, Love was delivered to my door sooner than I had actually expected but hey, I was not about to start complaining. I am a master 'smiler' so I went ahead to open the door with this huge smile that would melt even the strongest king. Love was standing right there leaning on my door in such a pose that was meant to just dismantle my thinking capabilities. Damn! Did I not just love this new delivery? Handsome, right age, right taste and all those little toppings Love comes with (you feel me girls?). Love: You must be the l...
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